Archive for the ‘Full of Crap’ Category

More snot than sense?

Thursday, December 11th, 2008

Hypothetical situation:

If I decided to dress up in all black — ski mask included — and go jogging around my neighborhood for a good workout at night, would that be a crime?  It might be cold so I should be completely insulated. Maybe I should take some free weights or something to help boost the cardio. Oh yeah, I don’t have any free weights though so I’ll have to take some DVD players or something. That wouldn’t be a crime would it?

Maybe not, but I guarantee you some cop would come up and start questioning me. What would give them the right? I’m not committing a crime and I’m sure I don’t have any warrants out for my arrest. Since cops don’t harass normal citizens exercising in their own neighborhoods, maybe he’s really a criminal who has shot the real cop and is impersonating him. I should run. Fast.

Yeah I have worked at a law school too long.  Or maybe it’s just this cold is causing me to have more snot than since.

Quick Technology Advice

Tuesday, December 2nd, 2008

When you take your laptop, computer, digital camera, etc. to a technician, please backup and remove (or just delete) your pornography.  This especially goes for homemade pornography.  I can’t begin to count the number of people, including law professors and students, that I will never look at the same again.

Now, I’m not specifically looking through documents for porn and I’m not going to make a copy for my own gratification like the Best Buy Geek Squad is infamous for, but I don’t want to see it and I was much better off before I knew what these users specific fetishes are.

One day, long after I leave Mercer Law, return to this blog for names and details.  Just kidding!

Unthankful for Thanksgiving

Sunday, November 23rd, 2008

I’ve always thought that almost all holidays are pretty much pointless (except for the obvious time off from work).  I don’t need a special day on the calendar to remind me that a battle was fought or a soldier died.  I don’t need a special month on the calendar to remind me of the contributions of black people.  I don’t need a certain 40 days designated to remember that Jesus died for us.

That being said, I do immensely enjoy Christmas.  Although I’ve always known what Christmas means religiously, after I was about 16 I didn’t really care for the rest of the season until I had kids of my own.  (I’ll post more on that later in the season.)

Out of all of the holidays ever created, I think that Thanksgiving is the worst.  Don’t think that statement means that I’m unthankful.  I am certainly thankful for everything . . .  from the big deal things like my wife, children and job to the little things like the CVS Extrabucks in my wallet and the coupons that Mr. Pizza sent me in the mail yesterday.  I just don’t think we should set aside a day to be thankful.  In some ways, forcing people to be thankful that one day of the year makes them apathetic the rest of the year.

As for the traditions and rituals themselves, I usually don’t care to eat food prepared by people who I barely know (like extended family members who I was forced to spend Thanksgiving with as a child).  In fact, when I was younger I looked for excuses to get out of going to church pot-lucks and I currently refuse to participate in covered dish activities at work.  Also, if I’m not at work, I don’t want to see turkey unless we go somewhere like Firehouse Subs or McAllister’s Deli because 90% of the time I take a turkey sandwich for lunch.

As for the family, my mother is gone, my dad is married to a Jehovah’s Witness (and out of respect for his wife no longer observes holidays_ and Kimberlie’s parents aren’t in the picture.  So all that is left is extended family, who I only see around funerals and um . . . things like Thanksgiving.  When I was in college, I remember hiding out in my room during the whole meal trolling AOL to find someone to chat with so I wouldn’t have to go downstairs.

So up until now, we’ve always done the traditional Thanksgiving thing because my mother was around to pretty much hold everyone together.  Last year, as she was falling victim to cancer, I even hosted the event at my house.  I just hope that wasn’t a “passing of the torch” type thing because I am blowing out the flame.

This year, we plan to do something completely different.  After Kimberlie gets off of work (she works every holiday except for Christmas), we are going to go out to eat.  We might search for traditional Thanksgiving food at some buffet like Ryan’s or we might do something completely different.  

There isn’t a shortage of invitations.  We’ve been invited to four different Thanksgivings — 3 different extended families and 1 friend.  But we have politely refused them all and we are going to have a nice meal out — without having to cook or entertain or wash the dishes or be somewhere at a certain time to eat food we don’t like with people we don’t like.  And then, we will come home and go to bed so that I can get up in the wee hours of the morning Friday and get a good deal on a new drill at Lowe’s.

The worst part about the entire thing is when people ask what we are doing for Thanksgiving and we tell them our plans.  The heavens open up and the pity party rains down. “Oh that poor Davis family.”  It’s like I’m committing a crime or something by deviating from tradition.  Surely if there weren’t others like us, the restaurants wouldn’t be open.

I’m not sure if we are establishing a new tradition this year.  If the kids were older, I would take them and volunteer somewhere feeding the less fortunate.  I’ve always wanted to do something like that, but seeing how I am day care on Thanksgiving, it’s not happening with a 2 year old.

Since I’m approaching 800 words in this blog post rant, I’ll end it now.  I’m sure I’ll post something before then, but anyway, have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

I’m Tagged!

Friday, November 14th, 2008

I’ve been tagged by Greg.  I usually don’t do these things but there is NOTHING on TV tonight and its raining (can’t run).

4 Random Things I Like About My Significant Other:

1 – She puts up with me.
2 – She supports me when I get into crazy new hobbies.
3 – She lets me have the remote.
4 – She loves me!

4 Jobs I’ve Had: (none of these were my official job title)

1 – Hot air balloon wrestler
2 – Sign artist
3 – Rooftop photographer
4 – Litter-box cleaner

4 Movies I’ve Watched More Than Once:

1 – Catch Me If You Can
2 – The Shawshank Redemption
3 – The Goonies
4 – Silence of the Lambs (or any of the other 3 in that series)

4 TV Shows I Watch:

1 – LOST
2 – Parking Wars
3 – Prison Break
4 – 24

4 Favorite Foods:

1 – Chicken & Dumplings
2 – Bar-b-que
3 – O’Charleys loaded potato soup
4 – Chocolate

4 Places I’d Like to Visit

1 – Alcatraz
2 – New York City
3 – Disneyland
4 – Space

5 Things I’m Looking Forward to in the Coming Year:

1 – Mackenzie getting potty trained (5+ years straight of changing diapers is getting old)
2 – Disney Marathon
3 – Tristan starting Kindergarten
4 – Change (ha ha ha)
5 – Going back to school

4 People I Tag:

Sorry, I don’t think there are 4 people who read this blog.

Wow . . . Alcatraz, Prison Break, Catch Me If You Can, The Shawshank Redemption, Silence of the Lambs . . . It looks like I’m fascinated with being incarcerated.  I guess if I’m ever on death row, at least I’ll get my 4 favorite foods!

Election Thoughts

Monday, November 10th, 2008

First, whether you are a democrat or republican, you have to admit that this was not a “fair” election.  Legally, it may have been fair.  But in reality it was not. 

  • Obama had the mainstream media by their collar from day one beginning with Oprah Winfrey pleading with him to run for president during an interview about his book. (That’s as far as I’ll take my Oprah bashing in this post.  After all, she did SERIOUSLY hook me and Kimberlie up last year during one of the biggest events on national television.)  The media preference was obvious much later as Sarah Palin interviews highlighted her errors and edited out her thoughtful answers.
  • Obama supporters (if not Obama himself) managed to turn the election into a civil rights issue.  The race card was promptly played against pretty much anyone who criticized Obama.  Voter registration drives also focused on minority populations — knowing that people vote skin color in places like Macon, Georgia.
  • The two party conventions weren’t even in the same league, thanks to a potentially destructive weather scenario that nearly cancelled the Republican National Convention.  Even though the convention eventually began, scores of speakers were never heard.
  • Obama also duped McCain with the whole public financing thing, allowing him to surpass previous campaign donation precedents.

Regardless of how I feel about the fairness of the election, I do plan to give Obama a fair shot.  I did go back and forth between Obama and McCain during the last several months so I’m certainly not bitter about the results.  I think in spite of the media bias, Obama will be under a microscope during his presidency.  Anytime you are the “first” of anything, people watch you more closely.  This happened in Macon with C. Jack Ellis, the city’s first mayor.

I hope that the election of a (half) black president will move us along as far as racial tensions are concerned.  Racism is rampant here in Macon and non-racists like me are sick of it.  Even if Obama turns out to be the worst president in history, if he can move America forward where race is concerned, than it will probably be worth it.

I also think the Obama will have better luck getting things through Congress than his opponent would have.  Many democrats were elected at all levels of government, no doubt riding Obama’s coat tails.  With that much support, he should have a nice honeymoon period as president.  At least until he screws up.

Another day in Macon

Wednesday, November 5th, 2008

I went to macon.com this afternoon to check the latest on the senate race.  Instead here is what I found:

Check out the top four stories:

  • Macon man carjacked at gunpoint while using ATM
  • Two teens charged in weekend shooting death to be tried as adults . . .
  • Macon man shot in leg during robbery
  • Employee robbed while leaving Macon gas station
For the readers who aren’t in central Georgia, this is a typical day here in Macon.  At the holidays approach and the economy continues to stall, it will only get worse.

Recap of a Week Gone Wrong

Friday, October 31st, 2008

This has had to be one of the worst weeks of my entire life.  Until yesterday, I had no transportation to or from work or anywhere else.  That means the kids had to stay at day care a little longer while Kimberlie chauffeured me from home to work and vice-versa.

I didn’t have very good days at work on Monday and Tuesday.  Actually, they were the worst days I have ever had at Mercer.  In a conscious effort to not ruin my professional career by blogging negatively about my job and/or colleagues, I shall spare you the details.

Tuesday, I finally received the police report with the other guy’s insurance, thinking that things would start moving along.  On the police report, the officer noted that the bike that hit me was a 2008 Harley Davidson.  I looked up the model number online and learned that it was a $20,000 motorcycle.

Wednesday, I stopped by a body shop to get an estimate on the amount of damage to the CR-V.  It came up to right under $6,000 worth of damage.  If that wasn’t enough, Mackenzie had another ear infection so we had to take her to the after hours pediatrician.  Only 3 more weeks to her surgery.

Yesterday, the director of employee wellness stopped by to let our department know about employee fitness and wellness programs offered by Mercer.  During her talk, my phone rang.  I could see that it was Progressive so I left the meeting to take the call.  They informed me that the other driver’s coverage had lapsed and that the claim would be filed under my policy (causing me to owe a nice deductible).  I told her I would call her back and re-entered the meeting — just in time for blood pressure, weight, and BMI screenings.  Of course, my blood pressure was sky high — right into the hypertension range on the chart.  Clearly those numbers were inflated due to stress.  I’ve never had anything but normal blood pressure in my life and I’ve actually exercised (ran) more in the last few months than ever before.

Why would you buy a $20,000 Harley, act like a hotshot on it, and let your insurance lapse?

I finally got a rental car yesterday.  It’s a black 2009 Buick Lacrosse.  If you can imagine a funeral, this would be the minister’s car at the beginning of the line.  I feel like I am 70 years old driving it.  The car is pretty nice — leather seats and all of the bells and whistles that an old man would need.  I can even crank it and warm it up by pushing a button without going outside.  It’s so new that Enterprise doesn’t even have a tag for it.  My cop friend’s wife says that I’m bound to get pulled over — not because of the tag, but because people my age don’t usually drive cars like that.

Today I am chasing the lions.  I am going to make this be a better day no matter what.  After all, it’s Halloween, Friday, payday, etc.  My biggest dilemma is whether to take the kids Trick or Treating or hit up another festival or two tonight.  I have a 10K in the morning, which should help my blood pressure.

Happy Halloween!

All Boomed Up

Monday, October 27th, 2008

Yesterday evening, a motorcycle attempted to pass me as I was making a left turn on my way to our small group. Either he was on something or he didn’t see my blinker from the sun. Of course, it happened in the middle of nowhere, but RIGHT in front of a biker bar. At first I thought this might be one of their friends and then imagined them coming out with aggression. The bikers were cool though. I was so shaken up that I couldn’t even dial 911 and I couldn’t think of my age or kid’s birthdays or any of the other details for the reports.

Here is the damage to my CR-V . . .

This is the bottom of my door. After the incident, I had to thrust all of my body weight against it to get it open and get out.

Another shot of the door and damage to the wheel/tire.

Here is where the guy’s helmet hit my door. Another two inches and glass would have been all over me. Another three feet and glass would have rained all over Mackenzie.

Another shot of the helmet damage to my door. The guy was bleeding from the face when the ambulance took him away. The EMT told me was extremely lucky and that he would likely be fine. That’s good news!

More damage.

My power mirror isn’t looking so powerful now.

Technically, the car is drivable, but the door doesn’t shut all the way and I have no rear-view mirror. The sheriff said I should only drive it home and to a repair facility. Looks like Kimberlie will be my chauffer for now.

Tristan says that my car is “All Boomed Up” and he actually woke up last night having nightmares about the whole ordeal.  Mackenzie keeps saying “that man break daddy car”.  The kids are fine though.  I’m sure they have some great stories to tell at school today.

I don’t know how, but somehow we are going to reduce the stress and drama in our lives in 2009.  That’s my first new years resolution.  This year has been full of disaster and I don’t know why its happening to us all this year.  So far this year, I have had to file claims with travel insurance (trip cancelled due to my mom’s death), life insurance (Mom’s death), and now auto insurance and health insurance (Mackenzie’s upcoming surgery).  The only thing left is homeowner’s insurance.  Let’s just pray my house doesn’t burn down or blow away.

I guess if we didn’t have bad days we wouldn’t appreciate the good ones.

My Choice for President

Friday, October 17th, 2008

I finally made up my mind on who I to vote for: John McCain.  Actually, my vote isn’t for John McCain as much as it is AGAINST Barack Obama.  Here are a few reasons I don’t like Obama:

  1. He has numerous associations with shady people/organizations: Louis Farrakkan, Jeremiah Wright, William Ayers, ACORN, Tony Rezko, and more.  Come on now, if your own pastor isn’t with you, why should I be?
  2. He is a socialist.  I took real issue with him when he told the plumber that we need to “spread the wealth”.  With governments around the world buying significant stakes in the banking system, this just seems a little too scary for me.
  3. I’m not wealthy by anyones standards, but I don’t like the fact that he wants to tax the wealthy disproportionately.  Bill Gates and Warren Buffett shouldn’t be penalized for success.
  4. In the final debate, Barack kept trying to take the “high road” and back out of an argument by simply declaring that they weren’t going to agree.  That might be fine in any other setting, but this was a debate.  This was the time and place to duke it out.  We don’t need that elitist attitude.
  5. He has a funny name.  We need to get these folks with funny names out of America.  Let’s take back the Dairy Queens and Subways, the taxi companies, and the Holiday Inns from these people with funny names.  We need to return these American insitutions to Americans.

    (That last one was a joke by the way.  I’m not racist and I have lots of friends with funny names.)

For the record, I’m not happy with John McCain either, but I do believe that he is the lesser of the two evils.

Helping Lawyers Help Themselves

Wednesday, October 8th, 2008

Lately, I’ve realized that my job just isn’t as fulfilling to me as I imagined it once was.  Then again, maybe it’s because this is the second longest job I have ever had and I am starting to get bored with it.  Three and a half years is a long time.  In my field, information technology, it is a common belief that if you stay in the same position for more than five years, you become stale.  That being said, unless something VERY lucrative pops up, I don’t plan to step into unemployment in this economy.

Don’t get me wrong.  I love working for Mercer University.  The benefits are excellent.  Insurance is decent, although expensive.  My leave benefits are the best I’ve ever had.  I, along with my spouse and dependents, can go to (a very expensive) college for free.  I have lots of friend here and I was even recently elected to staff council a few months ago to represent fellow staff members’ concerns to senior university administrators. 

But in my particular job, there are no real challenges anymore.  It’s just the same old crap — budget limitations, putting out fires, and figuring out how stupid end users can be.  You would think that as long as technology has been around, our population would have developed some basic computer skills.  You would also think that hiring managers would expect that from employees.  You would think that the powers that be would realize that Information Technology is an investment and that you’re just not going become more productive and cost efficient without it.

Along with all of that, there are no advancement opportunities in my current job.  Here at the law school I work at, there seems to be a notion that you aren’t qualified to do anything unless you have a law degree (J.D.).  Apparently, there are these magical fairies that sprinkle analytical and problem solving skills on you like pixie dust during the three years that you are a law student and that some how makes you better than everyone else.  What they don’t realize is that I, along with many other IT Professionals (non-lawyers), have the ability to analyze situations and develop solutions.  And on top of that, I could walk through the law school and point out many, many students and alumni who lack those skills, even though they have taken on six figures worth of debt trying to acquire them.

As far as fulfillment is concerned, I’ve been thinking a lot about the role I play in the overall scheme of things.  On a simplistic level, I support people as they become lawyers or while they teach people to become lawyers.  I don’t even like lawyers.  Because of my job, I do have quite a few friends who are lawyers, but I like them because they are people, not because they are lawyers.

Let’s take a look at how the public perceives lawyers.  If you asked the average person about lawyers, they would tell you that they make tons of money and they are all ambulance chasing crooks.  Now, I know better than that, but when the average person finds out that I am contributing to the creation of what they consider overcharging crooks, then I’m judged just as harshly.  Although I have never been one to care about what people think about me, I do wonder if this is where I am supposed to be.  Is this my mission in life?  My destiny?  Is this God’s plan for me? 

I guess until I sort things out and find my true calling, I’ll continue to help lawyers who help themselves.